Mr. Magee

Mr. Magee
Current photo, I promise

Tuesday, May 25, 2010

The Interesting Lives of Humans

My owner asked me today if I really thought anyone was interested in my blog. WELL EXCUSE ME!!! Have you looked at Facebook recently? If a human farts, they post it. Reading Facebook postings by humans is about as interesting as watching catnip grow. Between you and me, chasing mice is a whole lot more interesting. Humans on the other hand pay good money to see a mouse be a gormet cook in a major movie, then go home and put traps all over the house when a a good cat will do the trick.
I'm a good mouser and can promise my new owner with a mouse-free home. Mice are meant to be on the menu, not creating the menu.

Mr. Magee

Monday, May 24, 2010

Day One Cat Diet

The Cat Miracle Diet will help you achieve the same lean, svelte figure. Just follow this diet for 4 days and you'll find that you not only look and feel better, but you will have a whole new outlook on what constitutes food. Good Luck!

DAY ONE

Breakfast: Open can of expensive gourmet cat food. Any flavor as long as it cost more than .75 per can -- and place 1/4 cup on your plate. Eat 1 bite of food; look around room disdainfully. Knock the rest on the floor. Stare at the wall for awhile before stalking off into the other room.

Lunch: Four blades of grass and one lizard tail. Throw it back up on the cleanest carpet in your house.

Dinner: Catch a moth and play with it until it is almost dead. Eat one wing. Leave the rest to die.

Catch plenty of sleep between meals.